Tuesday, October 06, 2009

More on Ms

1964 was a politically exciting year

My parents got involved by joining the local party. We were roped in to help – mainly by addressing envelopes.

This presented a problem: the ElectoralRoll lists full names only, no honorifics at all. But this was still a formal age, & envelopes should be addressed to Mr, Mrs, Miss …

To begin with we were just using our skill & judgement – guessing, in other words - & I learned for the first time how first names can give a very good clue to someone’s age.

The agent found out what we were doing & put us right, gave us a lecture in how not to offend a voter. Use M/S for a lady. Or, if you have to choose (say if you’re canvassing) address every woman as Mrs - a Miss might be upset, but nobody ever took real offence, as a Mrs might very well do if you denied her status.

Advice which might still stand one in good stead. Almost nobody – except a diva, or a little girl – welcomes being called Miss these days. And although it is true that some will react fiercely to Mrs – especially if they are married but retain their single name – there are still plenty who flinch at the implied feminist label of Ms.

This was brought home to me a couple of years ago when I looked at a thick glossy brochure about how to get your 3 year old into (free) nursery education (the bureaucratic nightmare starts early these days).

The pages of contact details included the name of the head teacher or proprietor. A few were men. Not one was a Miss. The rest divided between Mrs & Ms. So when in doubt, & in writing, try M/S